Squiggle & Heart #10
A big part of starting this Substack came from an active decision to change my relationship to my phone. Taking my artwork off of Instagram and onto this platform has given me a schedule and intentionality with posting. Removing Instagram from my phone completely, and using it solely on a desktop, has given me incredible relief from getting Scroll Locked - that hypnotic state of endlessly thumbing glass.
(Only long-time PC user will remember the “Scroll Lock” button, but, rest assured, Apple devotees, what I just said was, like, really clever.)
I don’t know why I have no desire to scroll mindlessly on a computer vs my phone, but I feel no compelling force to go down the rabbit holes in which I’ve previously wasted hours, bouncing between disturbing news of the world, curated feeds of #BookedAndBlessed posts that made me feel inadequate, and any number of cat, dog, bird, capybara, and/or goat videos.
(OK to be honest, I really miss the latter.)
In some ways I feel I have left a physical place. I had this feeling when I left Facebook many years ago as well - that there was a space I was no longer inhabiting but where my friends still were. I have some remorse that I no longer know what is happening in friends’ lives, their kids’ lives, their dogs’ lives. And I imagine I might be missing out on some work opportunities.
But my mental health is more important than any of those things, and I can’t recommend getting away from it all highly enough. As a content creator, performer, and visual artist it is too powerful a tool to get rid of completely, but these small adjustments to my approach have made a world of difference for me.
So, as we head into a season that is often interpersonally challenging, while the world stage continues to break our hearts, may you feel free to throw away your phone, figuratively: consider turning off push notifications, take apps that are built like slot machines (i.e., social media) off completely, really parse out the tools from the drugs on that fancy rectangle. Decide that maybe you matter more than connectivity does.
‘Cause spoiler alert… You do.