Art For The Sake Of Arting

I have talked previously about the Thich Nhat Hanh practice, What Do You See, HERE. About 6 months ago I started keeping a large poster board and black pen next to my office couch, and whenever I was bored or looking for something to do with my hands while watching TV, I’d add to this drawing about all the interdependent factors and connections that make a book come to be.

There is nothing precious about this drawing, that’s for sure. It began, straight out of the gate, with a mistake. I meant to write “What do you see” on each page of the two pages of the central book, and instead wound up writing it oddly three times across the two pages. The curlicues that connect each little drawing were a weird choice and not my favorite aesthetic decision I’ve ever made. There’s no spacing regularity between the pictures. A lot of the associations only probably make sense to me.

But for some reason I kept going with it. In truth, it’s probably not done yet and I may keep adding more. I don’t know what is compelling me to keep moving forward with a drawing I don’t feel great about, but there’s something about that desire itself which I quite love - the insistence on making for the sake of it.

I was recently a finalist for a huge artist residency, which I found out yesterday I did not get. Though that was, of course, disappointing, to have been chosen as a finalist from over 200 entries was a great confidence boost, and having an interview about my work as part of the final decision process was incredibly helpful.

Most notably, the interviewers asked me where I saw my “art career” in 5 years, which I happily and graciously (I hope) refused to answer. Being able to confidently say I am not interested in engaging with that approach to my creative practice feels vitally important to my process, even if it were a factor in my not receiving this particular opportunity.

I am honored when my work makes me money, because that is one of the systems humans have created to show appreciation of one another’s outputs. I am also honored when people feel seen by my work from viewing it for free online. I am also honored when kids make art because they saw me make art. And I’m honored when Tisch students are a little more kind to themselves because they were in my class. All of that is my “art career.” As countercultural as it may be, I will not place the tyranny of goals on top of any of those acts of creation.

Instead, when any compulsion of artmaking arises, may I make it for the hell of it and see what happens: see whether it is of service to someone else, see whether it feels like Right Work, see if it inspires me to make something else. The only question I can find worth asking about my “art career” is, What do you see?